I just texted Tawnymara to send some love – her reply, “It’s going to be a good day”.
She never ceases to amaze me!
This calm and joy and positiveness I attribute to the love and prayers friends, and friends of friends are sending by the bucket loads! I’m humbled by your love, truly! Heavenly Father is acknowledging and sending peace.
This morning I was in a yoga class, at the end the instructor had us connect with our heart. My hand went to my chest and I felt my heart beating. The miracle of it all. And of course my mind went to the heart that’s somehow still beating in this precious girl’s chest.
I have been good at staying away from the ‘whys’ and ‘what ifs’ that generally creep in when a trial besets me. But I wanted nothing more than to let her have my heart! I know it’s not possible, I know it wouldn’t work. But I broke down and wept at the unfairness of it all.
This baby’s heart is so messed up – it really is a miracle that she is alive! Arteries and veins are backwards, valves are leaking, tubes are incomplete. There are a whole bunch of technical terms that make my brain hurt.
Tawny sent me a half dozen photos she took of me with Emery. When I received them yesterday my heart filled with gratefulness for all the precious time I got to have with her. Then I realized I didn’t get any with Tawny and her baby. Grrrrr, what was I thinking?
Thankfully I have news and images fed to me whenever I ask through Dallin’s mom, Rebecca, she’s my connection. Tawnymara shares often as well, always with a smile even when the news sucks.
This morning she shared that the arch (big purple arch in the image above) is not strong enough for the Dr.s to do what they initially planned. All the while she reported it with a smile and found the good in it, like now they know better what direction they need to go. Surgery will be bumped up to Monday or Tuesday.
Today Emery will get a name and a blessing. That’s when the infant is blessed by the priesthood. It’s not necessary for entrance into heaven. because we believe all children are born innocent and don’t need baptism until they are the age of accountability (usually 8). But it’s nice to hear the individualized blessing for the child, and have her name known for our records of the church.
Emery’s bilirubin is great so she’s off the light and enjoying snuggle time with the family.
More updates to come as they happen! Thanks so much for your bouee-ing powers being sent our way!